Words that might just change your life...

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else." - C.S.Lewis

"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." - Mother Teresa

"Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear." - Thomas Jefferson

"For those who believe, no explanation is necessary. For those who do not believe, no explanation is possible." - Author unknown

Still alive!

I hope i m not giving people the false impression that i was in Latvia for the past few months since i have yet to update my blog in a very looooooooong time. Yes finally i am back! (after travelling across the Latvian border into the Russian territory and got caught because i don have a visa and now i finally have my freedom!)

Just kidding!

I am still a tax-payers-sucking-JPA-scholar who still needs to write my first paper of my second semester in masters. Let the fun begins!

In life, in death

Reading through cnn and all the sad news of school kids being shot to death, usually saddens me. But this time, i m stronger than just fearing death itself. We can never know when death will come and take us away from the momentary earth. Just make sure we live a life of no regrets, seize every moment and do your best. If you are studying, go to every class. If you are watching youtube, watch every episodes. If you are serving in church, do your very best for God.

my deepest condolences goes out to all the parents, family and friends of those cute children and brave adults. not only in america, but in Syria, Palestine, Israel and all parts of the world. 

That's what friends are for...

Dear Friends,

Don't giv up on me yet! I'm still not ready to tel u all everything but i'm on my way there! Thanks for the wonderful weekend! Will try my best to keep in touch wif you all!

Yours truly,
Pat


p/s : WORLD!!! i m not ready for u too!

note to self

i am the one on the left...



Would appreiciate a sunflower right now...



yes Pat, keep breathing...

updates!

1. it's much more easier to contact me thru fb than hp... i can't seem to find my hp nowadays, it's either on the bed, in some bags, pockets or no where to be found... conclusion : if u need to contact me really urgently, DON'T sms me... i will end up not replying u n if u r in a dying state, then most probably u will die first b4 i reply u...

2. Due to the daylight saving in europe, it started to get dark really late... n i hav this habit of waiting for it to get dark to hav dinner which works really well in east malaysia, not so well in west malaysia and i might juz die of starvation in germany...

3. i decided tat i wan to be kiasu this sem!!! exams in german, bring it on!!!!!

4. Easter trip was fun, except for the driving in city-centre part... i ended up having a swelling ankle coz of too much driving...

5. i try very hard to be funny when i write this... so laugh, or else...

oops!

to the horror of the 2 motorists who're charging towards me, i drove on the right side of the road today... and when i notice the terrified looks on their face, i quickly steer left... so, nth really bad happens...

life is good back home!

Ring!

sorry for the long absence... the transition from being an intern to the only child at home and now back to normal student life has been affecting my normal routine...

things are different now, new phone (thanks dad!) new semester (erm no thanks!), new (old) hostel room, new subjects, new jacket (from pull and bear) and soon-to-be new shoes...

but some things juz stay same old same old... if i only knew who rang the freaking doorbell at 2:42am in the morning!!! it really juz bring me to a realisation tat i m back to the student life where the parties mark the start of a semester wif unconscious-but-still-moving-around-ppl ringing doorbells at night...

ah how i miss my student life! bring it on 6th sem!

not the intended one posted...

i actually wanted to post sth which was running around in my head, mainly about the aftermath of the sibu by-election but then i feel like it's too much of political stuffs around (and i still want my scholarship) haha so i decided to write about sth different... no more politics... watever happens, i remain neutral... ok, maybe not... haha

n this time, it's about my recent trip to the capital of Germany, Berlin...

frankly, i din actually plan for this trip, i don even bother checking wat are the must-see-places there coz i was thinking of meeting people mostly (i juz don wan to admit tat i m simply lazy), n i m glad i met a wonderful bunch of berliners* and a big shoutout to Mr Z, the best senior in the whole world! who despite having 2 reports* to write and hand in the next week, stil brought me around visiting places n people...

during this trip, i met a girl who told me that generally germans are quite ashamed of their own history and i agreed... but that was before i took a city tour wif the coolest tour guide whose story telling skills totally blows you off n the way she presented the whole history of berlin in just a few hours of the tour make me excited even about the fact that i m actually in berlin... during my last summer trip to poland, i've learned about europe during second world war and about the uprising of the national socialist party or widely known as the nazis and their downfall... then i came back to germany not knowing what happen after tat, n this time in berlin, i relearn again the history of europe from the germany point of view...

after the second world war there's the division between east and west germany (go read urself if u r interested about this) and berlin being in east germany is again being split into east and west berlin (confusing right? then it's time to visit berlin n get it all right...) so who's the government now? west berlin then was under a jointly occupation of the 4 allied powers and east berlin under the soviet rule... then come the berlin wall who separated the whole of berlin into 2 parts overnight... basically it's a tragic! and after dunno how many years, a misleading press statement leads to the fall of the wall... how interesting could it be? berlin wall came down because of a small mistake during a press conference???!!!

ok so after the press conference, of coz ppl were all hyped out... after so many years being separated n suddenly this big boss came out n said berlin is unified again... so ppl began to march to the wall and it was so overwhelming tat the border guards decide to put down their weapons n let the ppl thru... n the day was 9th of september, 1989... who would thought that berlin is such a young city! so once again, the power of ppl overcome the authority of the east german government tat had kept them confined all these years... so i said, germans! be proud of urselves!

ok i shud stop typing n go back to my studies... ok, as u can see from my post, i look calm n smart, but i m neither both! juz realise tat i lost my second bike this year n i m not happy at all! n exams coming out in 1 month time n i m freaking out now!!!! arghhhhhhhhhhhh!!! omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg! do u sense my nervousness n restlessness n helplessness now???

***Footnotes
1*berliner in german means a lot of things, first a donut wif fillings or second, ppl who lives in berlin, and third, it also refers to the late president of usa, J.F.Kennedy

2*report in german means unending work to do, to understand this, u hav to understand that behind every report, there's sth going on, eg. a lab experiment or a research topic or a group project, n behind that is another round of preparations for either a lab or discussions and behind that is again sleepless nights or nightmares which you don understand at all coz they are all in german and behind that is a short celebration of the previous report you hav manage to put in during the very last minute and behind that is the writing of the report n the process continue EVERY damn semester... ok u get the rough idea of wat a report is now...

Day 50 : 353hr 45min

Those are not juz any random numbers, today marks the 50th day or 353hours n 45 mins of my time in Company Sax (not real name of coz...) maybe i shud stay 15 mins longer juz to make it 354hours...

Wat prompt me to write sth on my 50th day?

I nearly got run down by a truck, not the big one of coz, but the small fork-lift-truck which ppl drive around as if they are Formula One racing car.  I shall call them the Stapler (it's a real name this time, but in german)  The stapler driver drives his stapler, as if he is Jay Chou in the movie Initial D, he literally drifts his stapler, as in by braking it's hind wheels and turn 90 degs in 2 seconds. And mind u, staplers don't usually comes wif signal light. I mean, how on earth am i suppose to know whether they are going to turn within 3 seconds?  ok, i shall be grateful tat i m still alive now, the stapler driver is quite used to idiotic ppl like me who stand in their way.  It was partially my fault for not staying on the pedestrian walkway, i mean, again how am i suppose to know where to walk n where not to? 

This is how a stapler looks like.

ok enough of the stapler story. No wait, there is another thing about stapler drivers.  They are the cutest ppl on earth, i mean who in germany gives u a horn 10 meters away and WAVES at u? awwwww.... they juz make my day... will definitely miss them once i go back to the books...

Where do I stand?

Lately i have been pondering a lot on this - where do i stand, in my family, in my studies, in my different surroundings eg Uni friends and my other Malaysian friends, as a senior or junior, and my other secret identity as a co-leader in my housechurch (ok now not so secret anymore) to my team and my other leaders. It's confusing, often when i stop and ponder and stare and let everything settle down and rethink again, it really doesn't bring me any further, i mean things might reveal themselves slowly but if i juz stood there and got stuck, what's the point? The fact is, keep walking, keep trusting and don't stop n stare too long.

As the germans say, macht weiter!

New series : The beginning of an end...

Today, I've witnessed something spectacular, the waking up of Rosetta, a satellite that underwent a deep space hibernation. I found myself in a very unfamiliar environment, surrounded by a group of people with faith, and a lot of it. In a country where security comes before anything else and at a time where internet and smartphones doesn't exists, under so many unknown circumstances in the outer space, they have faith to build something that was so ahead of their time - a comet chaser they called it. And their faith is so big that it sustains them through the 10 years since launching the satellite, and the pessimism of people around them.

So 20 years later, I have the honour to stumble upon an invitation to the Waking Up Event of Rosetta on facebook that I thought would be interesting for Miss G. I have no idea that it will be a life changing moment for me as well. I came from a place deemed of its great politeness of not saying 'No'. Contrary to my expectations, what I didn't realise is that how personal is the satellite to the people who are at the live event - tears were shed, emotions shown.

Hours of waiting for a slight change in the spectrum detector

And finally the Wake-up signal arrives!
#ESA's Rosetta comet chaser has 'phoned home after waking from hibernation. The spike on the spectrum analyser is the carrier signal. Data will be coming soon (a bit slowly 8.7 bits/sec -- because the spacecraft is 800 million kilometres away). From DLR Facebook page.

It was indeed a day I would never forget and I figure this is worth noting down as I am nearing an end of a journey, which is my student life. So I guess I will start writing again this year. 2013 was a great year for me because I've learnt so much out of it. 2014 on the other hand, is going to be exciting. It will be a year of changes and big decisions are expected to be made, so it will be interesting to see how everything is going to turn out in the end (for me personally), and it will also be interesting if I can have a platform to jot down the small things that contributes to the big picture at the end of 2014 and I can look back at it with a thankful heart.

Here's to 2014 - the beginning of an end.

reasons...

went to Münster because i wanted to visit Steph,
went to Düsseldorf because i wanted to eat japanese ramen and shop for a pair of shorts and clothes (since i forgot to bring the bag of clothes) and to visit Helen n Yun,
went for a bike tour around Münster because the place is meant for cycling,
dipped my feet in the lake because it's a sign of spring/summer,
paddled a boat while eating cake because it is fun~


someone please remind me again of why do we need reasons for everything?

feel like taking photos...

so i shall update u all wif a photo post...

Ah gong



Ah bao

both of them together...

Weird

i don't know whether it's just me but i think i've just developed a fear of quarter life crisis (if i were to live until 100 years old) Everything that happens around me seems so surreal and it is just weird. Here is a list of unbelievable events :

1.  I might be a mechanical engineer graduate soon! (if i manage to pass 6 papers and finish building my solar cooker)
2.  My youngest brother is going off to uni too.
3.  Hearing my parents discussing about buying 2 new single beds (for themselves)
4.  Start listing 25 things that I should do before I turn 25 and actually doing them
5.  Start thinking of the possibility of going on a hiking trip with my Tibet-fanatic-dad
etc etc and the list goes on

Guess what? The most unbelievable thing of all is that I am actually going to London next week! Like you, i never realise the significant of this trip to London until I was chatting with a friend and we talk about our childhood dreams and suddenly the thought hits me. I did, 7 years ago, wrote in my high school year book about my dream, one of them is to go to London in 2012 to watch olympics. Well i did not manage to become a volunteer for Olympic games this time but at least I.am.finally.going.to.London

Cheerio
Pat-going-off-to-Europe-Trip-again

more updates...

i think the exam stress r coming... tat's y i keep updating... haha

ok... now i shall post about things tat i wan to do when i go back as one form of motivation for my exams :

1. EATTTTTTTTTT my heart out... eg, kampua, kompia, zhou cai hun ngan, satay, be ting yue, kui chap, bak kut teh, lo mee, sizzling mee in hot plate...
2. Go KL n SHOPPPPPPPPP til i drop, not forgetting redbox...
3. Go malacca to eat chicken rice balls n satay celup...
4. Treat my family a very nice dinner in a very nice restaurant...
5. Visit pak cik n family in Bangi...
6. Go singapore to visit uncle n auntie (of coz to shop as well...)
7. Buy new laptop...
8. Brush up my foochow...
9. Go for another longhouse trip...
10. Make a video about one idea tat has been owey been there but i never put effort to it...
11. Meeting old frens (if there's stil any left in sibu...)
12. Look forward to meet the new ppl in youth service...
13.
14.
15.

and the list goes on n on...

to be cont...

Last but not least

I was away during the weekend. Instead of joining a very important seminar which i dearly missed and also meeting up and catching up with friends from all over the places, I choose to go alone to the airport to welcome the new batch of juniors arriving in Germany for the very first time after 2 and a half years of preparation in Malaysia. And I am very thankful for that.

It reminds me of a lot of things. It reminds me of who I was and how much I've changed since then and I appreciate the then-me because without it, there will be no now-me. It reminds me of my fellow ALG comrades when they first arrive, and oh boy how much we all have grown!

Looking at my fellow juniors, five years really seems like five minutes. And thanks to the very encouraging email from Mr E this morning, I was reminded of sth which can describe my feeling at the moment.

A Time for Everything

1 There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:2  a time to be born and a time to die,    a time to plant and a time to uproot,3  a time to kill and a time to heal,    a time to tear down and a time to build,4  a time to weep and a time to laugh,    a time to mourn and a time to dance,5  a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,6  a time to search and a time to give up,    a time to keep and a time to throw away,7  a time to tear and a time to mend,    a time to be silent and a time to speak,8  a time to love and a time to hate,    a time for war and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-9 (NIV)

Signing out,
Just-five-minutes-older-Pat

My utmost for His highest...

Some of my favourite quotes from day 6, 7 n 8 from the daily devotional book, my utmost for His highest by Oswald Chambers :

Worship is giving God the best that He has given you.

We have to pitch our tents where we shall always have quiet times with God, however noisy our times with the outside world may be.

When once we get intimate with Jesus, we are never lonely, we never need sympathy, we can pour out all the time without being pathetic.

Does my sacrifice live? He tells us to give things up for the sake of the only thing worth having - life with Himself.

It is of no value to God to give Him your life for death. He wants you to be a living sacrifice.

Who's my happily-ever-after?

When it comes to BGR topics, i always thought i knew it all... until i was in CA n the theme was yet another session of the BGR topic... but i was reminded once again, that God is actually sparing my future husband all the pains n troubles if i were to meet him now so unprepared, n tat i shud not pester God over n over again to show me who's the Mr-Right from the example of Adam and Eve. It was refreshing to know all these things that shows God majestic plans for all humankind.

haih... being God is so not easy... kesian Him...

Should I...

Should I say to you...
"Don't worry about me, everything's fine...
It might be when i really want to share my problems, i always thought that you might not be interested or you just ask the question 'how r u?' as a greeting...

i wish i can really tel someone bout wat i m going through now... anyone?